The Connor Chronicles

The original Connor Chronicles was written on or about October 12th 2001. While it was clear that our world would be forever changed, it's intent was to help everyone (including & probably especially myself) take a step forward in their own recovery from the aftermath of 9/11.

If you have copies of any Volume Of The Connor Chronicles not listed here, please send them to me so I can include them on these pages.

As always, until next time, stay safe!

Later,

dan

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXIX

Okay, explain this one to me. Last month I walked into Rite Aid, went straight to the pharmacy counter to pick up a prescription that my doctor had called in. Gave my last name.....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXVIII

It’s been nearly two years since I’ve written a Chronicles.  I’m not sure why, I mean I always have something to say.  In any event perhaps the election and all the nonsense has me a bit more motivated….so let’s get started shall we.....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXVII

Facebook asks me “What’s on your mind?”…..hmmmm…okay, here ya go......

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXVI

So, what the hell has everyone been up to? You don’t write, you don’t call…….....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXV

I have not written a Chronicles in ages.  Something tells me I’m going to have less time to write moving forward.  Perhaps I can get a ghost writer.  Maybe...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXIV

It’s that time of year again, where everyone is just worn down...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CXIII

So, where do we start? I have been trying to decide if I support the Occupy movement…...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CVIII

Well, its that time of year again, time to be thankful...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CVII

Breaking News, this just in, and we at The Connor Chronicles are ALL over it!  Legendary entertainer Michael Jackson has died!!!!  Despit...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CVI

Hi, My name is Dan, and I’m an idiot!  Seriously, I think ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CV

Alright we are about 20 minutes away from the Grammy’s. Jen’s in bed sick, and I’m still not 100%. Having a bailys coffee right now to warm me up. Before the running diary starts I wanted to cover one or 2 things. ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CIV

The definition of irony…..getting away with murdering 2 people, but ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CIII

Wow, despite the thousand eMails I received proclaiming Obama was …...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CII

Today I asked myself “Self, how do you know you are fat?” Let me count the ways…...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume CI

Time for some nonsensical ravings of the lunatic mind...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume C

Wow, the 100th Chronicles. It only took like 6 and a half years! In that time do we think Schmeds....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCIX

Well, it’s time for my annual running diary of the Grammy Awards.  I have to tell you I usually look forward to this night, but.....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCVIII

Alright, Jen, I hope you’ve been paying attention.....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCVII

It’s Christmas time in the greatest city in the world and...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCVI

Well, its that time of year. That time of year where we all give thanks. And yes, that means the annual list of things I’m thankful for……...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCV

It’s pretty scary worrying about a family member. And I must say all of your support, the eMails, the calls, the text messages…..they mean a ton. I can tell by your tone & words how concerned you all are. LET ME BE CLEAR!...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCIV

So, my niece Lorrain got married on Friday. Word is my sister gets upset every time she walks past Lorrain’s room. I would think she’d get more upset walking past the boys room…..

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCIII

There’s being safety conscious and then there is being neurotic! For example, ensuring your smoke alarm has working battery’s is safety conscious……….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCII

Well, its that time again! Yep, time for some nonsensical ravings of the lunatic mind! So let's get started….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XCI

Kirks engaged and now Bernie O has a baby….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XC

If anything the Chronicles are a lesson in Roman Numerals….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXIX

Being bald & fat was never really a problem because I always had the…….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXVIII

Ok, so trying something different. At the Kelly residence for the big Mets opener. I think I’ll keep a running diary of the game…..we’ll give it a shot. Who knows….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXVII

It’s been a long time since I’ve written…..you would think I have a ton of material, but I really don’t. But a recent movie trailer has put me over the edge...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXVI

Well its grammy night & I figured I would keep a running diary of events as I did last year. Let Bill Simmons sue me if he wants...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXV

So, Anna Nicole Smith was found dead. Investigators think Drugs & Alchohol may have been involved! Wow…..give these guys a promotion & a raise! I mean do ya think so Sherlock!

That’s like saying:g….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXIV

Ok….lets finish the year with some nonsensical ravings of the lunatic mind. Otherwise known as my random thaughts…..and some stories of course.

Global warming? What Global Warming….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXIII

Britney Spears hangs out with Paris Hilton for one week & already...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXII

Is Michael Richards Racist...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXXI

The dumbing down of America continues...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXX

Ok, a few years ago I vented about them banning dodge ball...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXIX

Barbara Streisand can lick my...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXVIII

I never thought I'd miss scam bitch, but this morning I sure did. I took the Q32 today for the first time in a really long time. And yes, I did wonder if I'd run into Scam bitch as I waited on the corner. Well, I got on the bus and ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXVII

Yeah, I know its been a long time since Ive written (who are you my mother for christs sakes) and I hope its worth it...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXVI

Let's talk about sports starting with KC Moores 2 Co-Ed team. Mike Haggerty ….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXV

Ok, it's been a while. You can all blame my brother Charlie for that. If he didn't talk me out of joining the NYPD I would be retiring this month. Then I would know what it's like to be Schmeds….

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXIV

Well, March is gone & April is here! What does that mean? Well, with the annual arrest/rehab of...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXIII

Ok, probably going to be more serious here than funny, but what the hell, we'll give it a shot. I mean the only reason I'm even releasing a Chronicles was to get the new web site out there.

So, what we will do is some nonsensical ramblings of the lunatic mind! Some of the girls went to Chicago to see a green river and have some pizza…. ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXII

Great news, last night I tested my SAP button on my remote control…you know, the one to catch a broadcast’s secondary audio! Wanted to make sure I knew ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXXI

Well folks, football season is over & the big game was not exactly exciting. I mean other than 4 or 5 plays there wasn’t much to watch.

So it’s time to start thinking baseball! And I for one am looking forward to an unbelievably exciting season rooting for my...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXX

I know we have friends and family that are transit workers, but sorry, they all should be fired. They are giving it to everyone of us right...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXIX

Well, tomorrow is Thanksgiving and like clockwork it’s going to be cold, windy with rain and or snow! It never fails! I’m checking the weather forcasts...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXVIII

It’a a reality of life that we will have bad/sad days. But somehow we always find a way to smile, a way to laugh. Well, I was pretty bummed this morning and then the unintentional comedy gods shined on me! I mean normally a 7am zool sighting would tick me off, but today...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXVII

You know what they say about guys with big feet!?!

No, not that you perverts & no not the stupid, “yeah big shoes…ha ha” line either.

When you have big feet and insert your foot in your mouth...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXVI

While trying to find clothes that I can actually get into and wear through the day without suffering too much I realized something! In my entire life my waist size...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXV

Someone tell Schmeds his plan didn’t work. You know, the one where he stacks his side of the bridal party with a bunch of big….ok ok fat….guys so that he would look smaller.

Yeah, it’s not working...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXIV

Ok….i’m pissed now. My heart goes out to all families of soldiers serving in our military. Especially those that have lost loved ones. I honestly think about soldier girl and others on a very regular basis.

But this women in Texas is really starting to piss me off....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXIII

When you go to Vegas with 10 guys I guess anything can happen. I mean it’s Vegas so you have to be ready . ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXII

Im not sure I can do last night justice, but I'll try. Let me set the scene. We're in the Catskills for the annual mayhem. ...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LXI

Houston we have a fucking problem and I’m not even there yet! Why do I ttravel? Seriously, its like fucking torture. The trip started bad enough...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LX

The French lost……yeah, that’s a shock. Seriously did anyone else jump for joy when they heard that London had won the 2012 games over Paris. Paris thought they were a lock! But apparently they stopped fighting for it once again. I love it!

Ok, so Lance Armstrong is going for his 7th straight tour de france win. Wouldn’t you love to see the big Texan cross the finish line, wrap himself in an American flag and...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LIX

Time for some nonsensical ravings of the lunatic mind! And some stories too. Like, for example....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LVIII

Most of you probably think it’s easy being a world class, world famous DJ. Especially one that has been so successful and on top of the game in the heart of the greatest city in the world. Well, it’s not that easy. Do you realize ....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LVII

So, I had to spend last week in LA. I’m not sure why I continue to get punished, but I do. So I book the trip, my regular hotel is sold out. Great…just great. Anyway, make my reservations and off I go to JFK. Flight out is oversold, so I’ll be stuffed in my seat like tomorrows turkey. Doors are about to close & seat next to me is empty. Here comes the family of 5 rushing onto the plane. Ok, which one ends up to me....

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LVI

Well, the Kinks were right. It’s a mixed up shook up world except for Lola. LOLA, Lola. I mean these days does it really have to be Halloween to find men dressed as women? Hell didn’t anyone see what Schmeds was wearing in KC Moores the night he got engaged? Never mind that he basically raped Mickey in front of us all on the pool table.

And how about women dressed like men? On the same night did you see...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LV

Sorry for the delay in getting this out. I’m moving a bit slow since the BBQ, which some people are referring to as “The Frat Party”.

Speaking of the BBQ, Megan, if your looking for your panties...

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LIV

So, NJ is looking for a new Head Giver of state. Clinton gets head & keeps his job, McGreevey gives head & loses his.

What do you call a Governor from NJ?

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LIII

Ok, putting the Olympics in Athens has to be the worst idea since giving Mary CRASHton a drivers license!

For years it has been known that they wouldn’t be ready. Now, 4 weeks before the games they have a power outage that lasts for 14 hours!

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LII

Well, another trip to LA is in the books. And after what is my 6th trip or so, I still have not seen signs of intelligent life.

This will probably be the last time my boss will travel with me.

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The Connor Chronicles Volume LI

Ok, it’s been a while. This being busy crap stinks. I’m really sending this because I have several announcements. However, we shall slip in a little comedy (ok attempt at comedy) first.

Gotta love those first warm days of the year.

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The Connor Chronicles Volume L

Normally when I get back from LA I try to get a Chronicles out within 24 hours. It’s kind of like a therapy, a cleansing of the mind if you will.

Ok, let’s face it, it’s flipping stress relief!

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XLIX

Ok, ignore everything I ever said about LA! I’m moving here! That’s it,
pack the bags gas up the car & point it West baby!!

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XLVIII

I've got good news & bad news.

The good news is that NBC has offered to sponsor The Connor Chronicles and
we are in negotiations. The bad news is that if we do confirm this deal,
for 2 weeks before the release of a new volume you will recieve eMails with
headings such as:

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The Connor Chronicles Volume XXXI

Coming to you straight from LA, actually Marina Del Ray....either way it...

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