The Connor Chronicles Volume LXIX

Well, tomorrow is Thanksgiving and like clockwork it’s going to be cold, windy with rain and or snow! It never fails! I’m checking the weather forcasts to see if winds will be over 20 miles per hour. If so, the parade is worth watching just to see the idiots trying to control the balloons!

Let’s list some things to be thankful for.

Like the Yankees not winning the Series….for this I say Thank You!

For an extended warm weather season that kept women showing off their bodies….for this I say Thank You!

For a fresh Keg in the Kegarator…..for this I say Thank You! How was this not #1?

For the Vikings beating the Packers on field goals as time expires…not once, but twice….for this I say Thank You!

For the Vikings beating the Giants in the ugliest game ever……for this I say Thank You!

For the complete comedy that is the Vikings….from the whizinator, to a ticket scalping coach, to an all out orgy on yachts, to an owner with the name Ziggy Wilf……for this I say Thank You!

For the show Rome which went from soft porn straight to lesbian action…..for this I say Thank You!

For the French and their continued complete idiocy and comedic material…..for this I say Thank You!

Actually let’s talk about France for a bit.

Have they surrendered to the rioting gang yet? Or did the factory that makes white cloth get burned down which would basically cripple the French military even more.

I understand they have raised their terror alert readiness level from run to hide!

It appears that the French military & police are overwhelmed by the 400 pissed off teenage ritors. Word is we are sending in 6 US Marines to stop the rioting. Yeah, we know that 6 Marines is overkill for the job, but we want to get it done in less then 24 hours.

Ok, that’s enough of that.

As most of you know, I have trouble sleeping. But I’m happy to say that this Sunday night I am going to get a great nights sleep! If anyone else has trouble sleeping I’m going to share my secret with you. This Sunday night on ESPN at 8:30, the NY Jets take on the New Orleans Saints. It will put you into a coma within 7 minutes!

How sad are the Jets? They are underdogs to a homeless team! Honestly, if they are going to sign up old washed up/never had talent QB’s from Long Island, when does Larry Faye get his shot?

Has anyone seen Mike Moore lately? No more Giant Mike! He’s gone from offensive linemen to full back! Working his way to tight end!

But Mike, don’t throw away those old clothes. Schmeds retires in a few weeks, so chances are he’ll be fitting into those in no time!

Whose up for getting drunk Saturday night…..lets face it I can stop right there cant I! But I’ll continue. Whose up for getting drunk Saturday night then sneaking into the Church parking lot & repainting all the spaces so they criss cross and block each other in? Then we grab some bagels & beers and watch as zool tries to park cars? Anyone?

Congrats to Rich & Delia on their latest arrival, Emma Rose! Either they left another baby in there or Delia’s been storing the turkey for tomorrow in there! If so, don’t eat the cranberry sauce……and YES there you have it….the Danny crossed the line moment of this volume….woo hoo!

Anyone coming to KC Moores tonight? We will be DJing……which I’m assuming means you all would rather sit home & stick swords up your ass sideways. For those of you going in to watch them blow up the balloons in the freezing cold….do they provide the swords or do you bring your own?

Ok, some announcements, check events page for details.

Tonight: DJing KC Moores

Sunday the 27th, LVD Memorial winter fund raiser: Governors Comedy Club

December 3rd, Random night of DJing at KC Moores…maybe some triva or something.

December 10th, Tommy Ashton Raffle night at KC Moores….always fun

December 17th, KC Moores Christmas party…we’ll throw some 80’s or triva in.

To all of you and your families…have a Happy Thanksgiving!

As always, until next time, stay safe, later,
Dan

"My karma tells me, You've been screwed again! If you let them do it to ya, you've got yourself to blame! It's you who feels the pain! It's you who takes the shame!"