The Connor Chronicles Volume CXIII

So, where do we start?  I have been trying to decide if I support the Occupy movement……..the problem is I do not know what the movement is?  Unfortunately I do not think they do either.  They are the voice of the 99%?  I am pretty sure I am part of the 99%.  I sure as hell know I am not part of the 1%. 

So, if the 99% are truly represented I assume they have candidates lined up for every election next November, including president, and it will be landslides all around?  No?  Ok, then you are not the voice of the 99%.......or even 50%.  But lets not let facts get in the way.

But don’t worry, Michael Moore, Jay-Z, Susan Sarandon and others are with you.  Because they too are part of the 99%.....Jay-Z is making money off of you people for christs sake!  Michael Moore is a condescending douchebag.  Brilliant film maker (Roger and Me and Bowling for Columbine are masterpieces), but he is a douche.

New York City is covered with Bus Lanes and Bicycle Lanes.  Do busses or bicycles ever use them?

What is the current generation called?  Generation Lazy?  Generation give me?  Generation Im entitled?  Do they even have a moniker or are they literally too lazy to come up with one?  Maybe while they are occupying everything they can give themselves a name.

I mean how lazy can these people be?  They text everything, and even then they shorten everything.  C u l8r?  really?  I mean for fucks sake instead of texting OK, they text just K.

These lazy fucks don’t even take their own SAT’s.

Donovans gets written up for violations (since addressed), but Chicken Charlie remains open?  Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE me some Chicken Charlie, but that place would fail a health department inspection in India.  And India still has the plague! 

Andy Rooney is dead……have his eyebrows stopped growing?

Being a Vikings fan is hard enough………being a Vikings fan married to a Packers fan right now is just not good.   Married 15 years last week, and this football season has been the longest stretch of those 15 years.  Not for Jen though……..she’s happier than ever.

Could be worse, I could be a Penn State fan.  An older woman that chases younger men is a cougar.  An older man that chases younger men is a Nittney Lion.....hey now

Anybody think there are people wishing Joe Corzine died in that car crash a few years back?

I am assuming that Rex Ryans welcome is wearing out.  At least the guaranteed super bowl victories? 

Zarchies is a Pudgies.  The Woodside Deli is a Crown Fried Chicken.   We already had KFC.  We just need a Popeyes for the cycle!

Snuck out to McDonalds this afternoon for lunch………and there was this huge group of kids there  who are in town to perform in the parade.  That has to be a pretty cool experience.  However, I just saw on the news an interview with one of the kids who said “We are really looking forward to the Parade tomorrow”……..ummmm…tomorrow is Wednesday.  Parade is the day after.  Maybe its generations stupid.

It’s Thanksgiving, it’s the Holidays.  I normally love this time of year.  Not sure what it is, I am just not in the mood this year.  Wouldn’t mind sitting home with the remote and some wine (basically what I am doing now).  Maybe its because its too warm.  I don’t know.  Just not up for it.  Maybe when I decorate Monday (and yes I am off Monday…11th commandment and all) it will change.

In any event, it is Thanksgiving, and that means it is time to list the things we are thankful for this year…..so lets get to it shall we.

I’m thankful for the new sitcom The New Girl…….cause Jess makes me laugh.  A hot geek….LOVE IT

I’m thankful for still playing with fun technology…….my Sony tablet rocks….and yes, I can throw video and audio from my tablet to my TV……lets see you do that with an iPad…..its so fucking cool.

Im thankful for Happy Hour at my new job………..yes, every Friday in the office….its a booze fest……and they pay me……seriously…..somone pinch me….harder…harder….yeah, who’s your daddy.

I’m thankful for the comedic minds of John Stewart and Stephen Colbert.  You do not have to agree with their political views……….i don’t in many/most cases……but they are ALWAYS funny…..smart funny.

And on the other end of the comedy spectrum I’m thankful for Daniel Tosh of Tosh.0, cause that is funny shit too.

Im thankful for wines from the Pacific Northwest….specificaly those of the 2007 vintage….how ya like me now my bitches?

I’m thankful to ProFlowers.com……..i come up with some annoying requests that most companies and their systems could not handle……they have never let me down.  Sorry Jim McCann.

I think I am thankful for the show Covert Affairs.  I think…that I think….she is hot….i can’t make up my mind.  Now, Fi from Burn Notice…she’s hot……uh, thank you.

I’m thankful to the movie Bridesmades………NEVER would I have thought a bunch of women shitting and vomiting could make me laugh…..but damn did it.
I’m incredibly thankful for the tickets to Book of Mormon Jen got for her birthday……..I have not laughed that hard since my birthday roast.

I’m thankful for still loving music, without it, wouldn’t life just suck?

I’m thankful I have never seen the show Nadia G’s bitchen kitchen…….the commercial just came on while I was writing this and it looks terrible.  The only thing that I can think that could look worse is Schmeds in spandex.

I’m thankful for prociutto……..i mean I cant thank bacon every year!

I’m thankful for indoor plumbing.  Self explanatory no?

I’m thankful for chocolate covered almonds……..ok…ok…chocolate covered anything.

And lastly, I’m thankful for the time spent with old friends……its happening less and less….and that just sucks.

Have a great Thanksgiving everyone, and please, safe travels.

As always, until next time, stay safe, later,
Dan

"My karma tells me, You've been screwed again! If you let them do it to ya, you've got yourself to blame! It's you who feels the pain! It's you who takes the shame!"